Depression after a divorce

Depression due to divorce causes a lot of unpleasant moments for both spouses: distress, discomfort, settlement of housing issues, nervous division of property, parting with children and other moments.

Depression after divorce in women first carries an acute crisis state( neurotic depression), then it goes into such a state as chronic depression, and it is very difficult for a woman to return to her former mental balance.

According to statistics, every eighth woman tries to make a suicidal attempt, and every fourth woman needs psychotherapeutic help, the rest of the depression after the divorce goes through on her own.

Depression after a divorce in women needs treatment. The first year after the divorce, women sit down on antidepressants, visit a psychologist, take a great interest in meditation. First advice to former wives: do not take the departure of the spouse and your disintegration as something irrevocable, but you should not run after him. Do not say, "You'll come back!" This will increase resistance. But hold the door open for him and maintain friendly relations. And when he ripens to return, he will do it contrary to the most popular opinion that they do not return to the former. In large cities, according to statistics, every fourth man again marries his ex, and a divorced third would like to go back.

Depression after divorce in men develops much later than in women and it seems that they carry the gap much easier for women. After divorce, men do not have obsessive thoughts and memories, no guilt, no fear of the future. This ease of transition always shocks former wives. But let's see what happens to them next. How is their fate?

After enjoying the long-awaited freedom for a year and a half, they become overwhelmed with depression, confusion, chronic fatigue, alcohol abuse, feelings of loneliness, overeating, decreased interest in work( emotional burnout), decreased sexual activity, sexual disorders.

And the cause of depression after divorce in men is a banal disappointment. Men think that once they are at large they will meet an unusual, sexy and younger woman. These dreams are carried out in part, and a close acquaintance with women or mistresses does not bring the long-awaited joy and celebration of life does not work, and there is depression after the divorce in men. In parallel, there is a clear reassessment of the previous failed family life, and in memory the joyous and bright episodes of life emerge. And already at this time the most part of the divorced people think about returning to the family, but alas, the severe laws of men's stereotypes categorically forbid them to do it. This period is characterized by the accumulation of mental fatigue from loneliness and independent life. Not everyone will be able to live one long time and after several weeks of intoxication of freedom, men will have an epiphany, and they will be covered by belated depression after a divorce.

Depression and divorce is such an original union, not a single divorce process has not been without unpleasant moments. And most men begin to destroy themselves from inside with alcohol, overeating, excess entertainment and sex. Women are more organized creatures and their desires are better suppressed, which means they are more likely to get out of depression after a divorce.

How to get out of depression after a divorce right and quickly? This question torments everyone.

There is a way out of the depression after the divorce, but we allow ourselves to suffer, experience, despair, once again live unpleasant memories, lie down, sad, and this swamp tightens and it begins to seem that the forces are leaving. If this divorce process is completely exhausted and you do not already know how to get out of the intrusive depression after the divorce, then first of all calm down. Divorce is just a break in relationships. Understand that people can not live against each other's will, and promises of eternal love remain only a promise. Accept this fact and life will go into the ordinary course. Do not be afraid to talk on this subject with those who are ready to listen to you. Remember, it will be very short time and this divorce will not cause you so many negative emotions, as now. You will remember calmly about depression and divorce. It is often written that the couple are the closest people. Remember that relatives are parents and children, and spouses share common goals, interests, inclinations. When this chain is broken, there is an imbalance in the family. Something begins to go wrong. And love? What is love? According to Stendhal: it is a competition for who will bring happiness to each other. And here the love has passed, apathy, disappointment has come. .. It is not necessary to row, thank the spouse for that time that you were together and release it. One stage of your life has ended and a new one will necessarily begin, and what it will be - it depends only on you, on your thoughts, desires, dreams, actions. A man is amazingly arranged: how grieved he is at the loss of wealth acquired in marriage and how much indifferent to the fact that time is irretrievably gone from him, and this is the time that can be lived joyfully without depression and sorrowful memories of marriage. Perceive the divorce as a release from scandals, obligations, betrayals, deceptions. Complete the list yourself.

How to live on after the divorce? Do not live in the past, do not expect anything from the past, do not engage in self-flagellation, and then the past will come to visit you, but in time, but for the time being build a new life in a brick, day after day. Meet new people, do not shut yourself in, smile, change your image, update your wardrobe, go on a trip, go in for sports, enrich your life with those pleasant moments that were not available in marriage, fulfill your dream - for example, a new car, do not forgetAbout a balanced vitamin nutrition, forget about alcohol( hangover does not add joy, and health, too).And you have a new life! In a new free life it is necessary to walk healthy, and most importantly a self-loving person. And only then you will be loved again and life will be clobbered with a new key!

More articles on this topic:

1. Depression after parting

2. Chronic depression

3. Postpartum depression